This Almost Didn’t Happen

When I say that this almost didn’t happen, I refer (of course) to this blog post.

I recently started tracking my habits again. And I like listening to self-development books. One of the recent audio books I listened to was  Atomic Habits by James Clear. In the book he says you can take your habits and try to not “break the chain”. There is something so compulsive about this. You want, I mean want to not see there is no break in the x’s you’ve written down in your habit tracker.

It’s been a long day and I had just gotten home around 8, then spoke to ny brother for an hour. Now, you might think that 9pm is not that late, but I am usually an early riser, sometimes as early as 4am, I refuse to get up ANY earlier than that. There’s something about getting up earlier than that that’s just wrong. And I had made a promise to myself that I would stick to my deadlines. And today (Wed) is the deadline for the next blog post. So, I had to.

Right?!

Of course I did!!!

I’ve broken so many promises to myself that it’s almost embarassing, well is embarassing. I go crazy about keeping promises to anyone else. Why am I treating myself differently?

And the thing is today was a good day with a ton of positive things and doors opening to really try and do what I want with my life (which is writing btw ;)). I should be shouting it from the rooftops. I have, of coursed, shared with my knitting ladies M & N, my brother, and (shockingly) my mom. Sadly she is not as supportive as I need most of the time, it’s sort of an on-going theme in our relationship. I have a writing opportunity and a potential future work for a passion of mine and I received my certification to substitute teacher,

This makes me feel a lot better about my current unemployed situation. I’m sure that it’s control (being in control of something) issue at work here. Lol.

Doesn’t matter.

Back to the important thing…this blog. This feels a bit metta here, but I think I’m okay with that. I made this thing (aka le blog) and I’m SUPER proud of that. I’m also holding myself accountable to well, myself. It’s important to keep promises to one’s self. You are your most important asset, right? And if you can’t treat yourself like you would treat others I think that can eventually be detrimental to you.

I can attest to that.

I’m NOT doing that again.

I’m important and I deserve to treat myself that way.

Right?

The original metta pic I took with an entirely different angle I had in mind.